Today..Is Not The Day To Die

I couldn't do that to my best mate. It's bad enough that i'm currently locked in my room, when i should be out there socialising. But no, i couldn't do it, not today.

Even though i feel i should. I know its been a running theme the last few days, weeks. I'm sorry i keep mentioning it. But in a way this is my daily record of how fucked up my moods are.

I keep thinking about really bad stuff. I've started planning.

I know when i will have the oppurtunity.

I know there will be nobody around to stop me.

I know i won't be found before i die.

I know this will be it.

The end.

But no, i'm not that stupid as to post when i will do it. I can't let anyone stop me.

Even though in a roundabout way i guess this is (another, and one of many) cry for help.